Optimum Inspiration

Ladies you know those days when you know you look good. You know the days when your hair is right, your outfit is on point, and despite the fact that your feet are killing you, you are still walking like you just put your heels on! Well, I had a day like that a few days ago. My hair was in a cute funky up do and I was wearing dark blue skinny jeans with a ruffle brown top. To top it off, I had on my stacked brown peep toe Steve Maddens and was carrying my knock off Marc Jacobs bag. ( don't judge me.....you don't know my story lol !) Anyway, I was looking FIERCE! So I decided to go run some errands. On my way to the beauty supply store ( yes that is a errand! I needed a deep conditioner and maybe a new nail polish!!!) I realized that despite the fact that the night before I got into argument with my mother, despite the fact that there were several bills due,and despite the fact that I seemed to have miraculously gained two pounds.....I was feeling pretty darn good. I got up that morning and said "I'm going feel good." I felt good cause I looked good! What makes you feel good? Is it taken pride in your appearance, like me? Is it studying that extra hour for a test? Is it creating a master piece out of your specified art? Or is it taken that extra time at the gym to work on your abs? Whatever it is that makes you happier......do it! Life is to short to live a miserable life. Stay Positive! Life cant be lived to the fullest unless you are inspired. Always be on the look out for Your self inspired beauty!!!!!!!!!!!

Optimum Knowledge ( I am not my hair)

As I sit here in this coffee house in Harlem, I see such a plethora of beautiful women. These women run the gambit of white women with long straight hair to dark skin black women with amazing Afros. I can sit here and observe and appreciate the outer beauty in all these women. I try to see beauty in everyone .Unfortunately, Not many people can share my sentiments. How we define beauty in this county is largely based on what we see in the media. The lighter you are or the straighter your hair is the more desirable you are. This attitude often rolls over to our everyday life and often is a huge road block in women finding and defining their S.I.B (self inspired beauty). My friend Hemangi (a beautiful Indian women who finds her S.I.B in not only her education but in her innate ability to want to correct injustice)brought to my attention a article in Metro newspaper entitled " We've Got A lot In Our Hair" written by Marc Lamont Hill. In his article he discussed his visit to a African American private school. The principal of this school was planning on changing the school dress code to exclude natural hairstyles such as braids and dreads. The claim of this principal is that these hairstyles are not professional and they will not help in the "real world". What does this mean? As a country are we telling our young black people that what they were naturally born with is not professional or desirable? Are we telling them that the only way they can get a job is if they chemically straighten their hair to resemble their white counterparts? This issue also extends to other cultures. In the white community, often the women who has blond hair and blue eyes is conceived as being more attractive as oppose to a women with olive skin, dark brown eyes, and dark hair.Or in the Indian community were Aishwarya Rai ,a talented Bollywood actress with green eyes, is conceived as being the definition of Indian beauty. Or in the Asian community were " eye correction surgery" ( this is when a person of Asian descent gets surgery on their eyes to appear less Asian....MADNESS!!!) is becoming increasingly more popular. Why is this? There are obvious reasons, and not so obvious reasons, why beauty in this country is based solely on a white standard of beauty.This article is the first in a serious of articles that I will refer to as " I am not my hair". The serious will deal with the issues women of color face about how they define their beauty. What are you thoughts on this matter? How do you define your outer beauty? As always I have many opinions (My husband says I am very opinionated.....I wonder why?) Anyway, Until next time! Remember to ALWAYS be on the look out for you Self Inspired beauty!

Optiimum Appreciation

The other day I was walking in Manhattan when two men rolled down their windows and yelled something obscene and gestured for me to come over to their car. I politely smiled and kept walking ( after all I am a taken lady). These three unattractive women ( they were unattractive because they were acting ugly!!) were crossing the street the same time that I was. They assumed that the guys in the car were talking to them. When the group of girls decided to walk over to the car the men inside said " Not you fat girls , the pretty one walking the other direction" Great! I was the only women on the other side of the street! In all of NYC, at that time I had to be the only person going that direction! After the guy made that comment I crossed the street from my direction and the group of ladies crossed the street from their direction. Now I was directly in front of the firing squad! In passing, one of the girls bumped me and said " Move out the way B@tch! " I was Sooo mad! I could not understand why she was mad at me. I did nothing to her! I didn't say anything! I didn't even look her way before she bumped me! What I did next might not have been the best way to handle this but, after she bumped me and told me to move over I said " I wouldn't have to move out the way if you weren't so fat B@itch!" Forgive me father for I know not what I do!!! Ok....maybe I was well aware of what I was doing but I am pretty sure she had it coming right?!!!....Wrong....I should have let it go. My question is why are women so nasty and toward one another. If a women looks good why cant we complement her instead of putting her down. Think about it, when another women gives you a complement, how does it make you feel? It makes me feel great!!! I know I love getting complements so I like to give them out. Ladies, we need to stop being threatened and give credit were credit is do. We should stop hating and start appreciating!!!! ( that was little corny but, you get what I'm saying ) There will always be a women who is prettier then you,smarter then you, and even skinner than you but if you realize your own beauty , these women wont be a threat to you. Ladies if you are constantly on the look out for your self inspired beauty, the practice of not hating will come easily!!! Until next time!!!!!

Optimum Health (You are what you eat)

If in fact you are what you eat, why in the world am I presently resembling a round juicy apple ,more then that slender, sleek, yummy chocolate Twix bar that I had a moment ago? Someone really needs to let my jeans know about the "you are what you eat" concept....because apparently....they didn't get the memo! One of my BFF's said to me the other day "what you put in your body is just as important as what you put on your body. " (famous words by Cherie Keogh) I recently realized that I spend so much time thinking about what I'm putting on my body that what goes in my body rarely takes precedence.The yo-yo dieting, the eating late, and the huge portions of food are really hurting my insides. I decided last week that I am going to make a life style change and start treating my body the way I treat my new Jessica Simpson round toe pumps! ( just got them at DSW....AMAZING!!) I want to treat my body with care and make better choices . I also decided to work on my mind set. I will stop calling myself fat. I know Im not fat, but the images of those size 0 models just makes me want to shove a big mac down their throat!...........Sorry i lost my head... A VEGGIE BURGER DOWN THEIR THROAT ( this is about healthy eating after all...lol ! ) I would love to loose some weight but I am in no way a tub of lard. Ladies, we all need to start treating our bodies like a precious commodity, because it is! We need to stop comparing ourself to other people and start to live our healthy life. Did you know that 78 percent of black women are overweight!....Just that percentage alone made me wanna put down my Snickers bar and pick up a banana! If your two thin ,overweight, or just have bad eating habits, it time to change now! Join me while I try to obtain optimum beauty,self esteem, and health. I'm going to be on the look out for my self inspired beauty!!!!!!

SELF INSPIRED BEAUTY OF THE MONTH

I have been privileged to have known some amazing women who are so clearing self inspired. This is why I have decided to incorporate a "self inspired beauty of the month". The very first women I am going to feature inspired me to follow my dreams. She even inspired me to start this blog! She pretty much told me to get off my butt,stop complaining and do what makes me happy.( she said it in a much nicer way of course) That is why I see fit to feature her first . We went to college together for a little while. She has since lived in Australia for a year and has traveled to other parts of the world. She is now in the world of fashion and costume design and has gotten to work with people such as Donald Trump and Chirsettie Michelle. I want to be like her when I grow up! She has a amazing man who is very clearly in love with her and treats her like the queen she is.One night at their amazing apartment in Harlem, Jason ( her man) said to me " She keeps me laughing, she is like my little laugh machine.....I Love her" . He is right! She is very funny! That very same night she broke out in a break dance on a whim while her man cheered her on! Very funny! They are clearly in love. She has a amazing sense of style! Her accessory game is on point! She incorporates vintage pieces into her outfits which bring the outfit to a new level. Last time I saw her she was wearing a vintage scarf around her neck that was tied in the most chic way that she didn't even need any more accessories! She even had a idea that one weekend we should go vintage. She called it "Vintage Sundays" when she does go I will most certainly be there. I need to step up my accessory game and she is just the person to show me how.Not only is her style amazing but so is her heart. I love the way that she can see the beauty in other women because as women we often "hate and don't appreciate" She gives compliments to women without feeling threatened. It is my belief, that this is one of the signs of being a Self inspired beauty. The women I am talking about is Cielita Thomas , Self inspired beauty of the month. Thanks Cielita for kicking my butt into gear to follow my dreams.


May 1 at 11:49am
Reply
Name: Cielita Thomas

Occupation: Fashion Stylist/Costume Designer

Whats your Inspiration in life? My life……(the ups coupled w/ the downs).lol

What city do you live in? Harlem, NY

How would you describe your style? Vintage Glam w/ a side of Rocker Chic

Skinny leg or boot cut jeans? Skinny

pointy toe or round to shoes? Round

Whats your best asset? My smile

Whats your fav beauty product? There’s too many…….I’m totally a product junky. Lol. Mmmmm…okay, maybe coconut oil. It’s great for hair and body and I gotta have my bronzer, blush, and a lil mascara.

What do admire most in a women? Our innate ability to nurture.

What do you feel the most important asset is that a women can posses? Love for self and positive energy.

What in your environment inspires you to know your beauty? Great question!! Omg!!! Ummmmm. NYC and all the beautiful ppl and forms of art here. You can’t help but be inspired by this place. We turn trash into beauty! Lol

Do you consider your self a self inspired beauty? Yes, I am self inspired on a regular basis but the strength of others inspires me the most.

Optimum Power ( Dont give up your power)

Today I was riding on the four train . At the Union Square stop, a young couple walked into the train . They were clearing aggravated and arguing with one another. The young lady , who wasn't more then 18 years old, was impeccably dressed. She was wearing the most dainty round toe Steve Maddens that I drooled over while browsing on 34th street the other day. She had the most outrageous theory empire waste navy blue dress and a knock off Louis Vuitton speedy purse ( oh yea.... I can spot a knock off!) Her hair was in a well kept curly afro with light brown highlights. She wore light gold eyeshadow and deep red nail polish. She was simply stunning! The young man she was with had much less curb appeal. He was clearly in need of a haircut and desperately in need of a shave! And I might be mistaken, but I am pretty sure he was missing his two front teeth! He was in no way as attractive as the young lady.I was extremely taken back that they were even together. Not only did she look better then him but she was clearly on another level mentally. He held a ipod touch and was blaring some song by Rick Ross , while she held a copy of " I know why the caged birds sings" by Maya Angelou. Every other word out of his mouth was a curse while she decided to speak softly during their argument. They just were not on the same level! I was very intrigued with their conversation, though I tried to play it off by pretending to read my most recent book. They were arguing about the no tooths guy whereabouts the previous night. The young lady informed him that he was caught because her mother saw him on her block kissing another girl!!!! OMG! At this point I was waiting for the break up speech. You know the one that says your a dog, I'm not giving you anymore chances, and I'm better than you. But that speech never came.The whole ride back to Brooklyn the girl was apologizing to this no tooth guy for not trusting him. I wanted to scream! Her mother told her about him cheating, he has done this to before and he is not even on this chicks level!!!! Why cant this girl just get a better man?! One of my biggest issues with women is that we don't realize the power that we have. We often find some looser guy who is not worth our time,body,and soul and we surrender all of our power! What do I mean by power? Women if you realize it or not we run things ! If a man is truly in love with a women he will do anything in his power to make that women happy. You ever heard a older couple who has been together for years talk about their relationship? If you have you often hear the husband say " If mama aint happy then nobody is happy" or the husband will say " Ask the wife, she is boss lady" Not to toot my own horn but ,My man will go out his way and make himself uncomfortable just to make me happy. ( hey boo!) He always has, and because he loves me I will always be first on his list. How do I know? He told me! Most importantly he shows me. Ladies I guarantee you when you realize and find your power that is when you will attract a good man. Good men like strong women who don't let them do whatever they want. This is why ladies the "Bitch" always gets the man. (more about that later) . Below I have comprised a list of what constitutes a good man and a undesirable man. Read the list and tell me what you think. Please feel free to add or subtract to list in the comment section.( click on the word comment at the end of the article) This is the first in my series I'm calling "optimum power"......stayed tuned for the next installment titled " The Signs of a Good Relationship" .Remember that you are the prize and that you should be treated as such. Its ok to let a man spoil you and make you his queen. When you know you got a good man........MAKE HIM YOUR KING!.....I got my king! Anyone who knows me knows that I am spoiled because of my King .......Until next time, I gotta go right now...King Reggie needs some attending to....... But in the meantime be on the lookout for your self inspired beauty

SIGNS OF A GOOD MAN

He often puts your needs first
He often wants you to be happy
HE NEVER CHEATS!!!!!
HE NEVER CHEATS!!!
oh and HE NEVER CHEATS!!!
He calls you often just because
He ask you how your day was
When asked " Baby do i look fat in this?" He quickly replies "Sweetie how can such a beautiful women ever look fat in anything! "
He is respectful
He opens the door for you. ( My man still opens the door for me and we have been together for almost ten years)
When your happy.....he is happy
He is a man of integrity


SIGNS OF A LOOSER

His needs always comes first
He clearly doesn't take your felling into consideration
He often lies about where he was
HE CHEATS ON YOU!!
He flirts with other women and has inappropriate relationships with them
HE CHEATS ON YOU!!!
He only text you
He is disrespectful to you
HE CHEATS ON YOU!!

You have to ask him to change his relationship status on facebook to " in a relationship" and ladies don't buy the excuse that he forgot. Because when a man is in love, he is not afraid to put it out there.

He wants to keep your relationship on the Down low for awhile. What! Tell him you will not be his best kept secret. This is just a sign that he wants to keep his options open. Don't believe me? Ask any honest man who will tell you the truth.I did, and they all said the same thing.

HE CHEATS ON YOU!!!!!!!!!!